Saturday, December 29, 2012

Reflecting and looking ahead to 2013

Honestly,I'm ambivalent about starting a new year.  The last few years for me have been just blah; nothing spectacular to write home about.  I have to say most of what has been going on has been due to my bad choices and my decision to "do me" with no regard for the consequences.  I joke about how I've broken at least half of the Ten Commandments since 2008! While I don't regret any choice I've made, I know I want to do better, live better and get back to the true me. 

The last few years have taught me that I'm not perfect (gasp!) and I'm not better than the next person.  I used to often say "what kind of person does X?"  Well I've discovered that person is me, or you or whoever.  No one is above making a bad choice, so never say what you will NEVER do. 

I don't make new year's resolutions because, well, I just don't.  What I will say is if God allows me to live into the new year, I plan to become healthier and not just physically.  I want to become healthy spiritually, mentally, emotionally and socially.  Part of that plan is to return to counseling.  I need to do this for me and for my son as well.  I've struggled alot this last year with depression and anger and have had some scary thoughts that I've never experienced before. 

I don't blog much and probably will blog even less in the new year because decreasing my internet time is another plan for the upcoming year.  There are too many other things I could and need to be doing and I have realized the internet is a time killer for me. 

To my handful of readers, have a great, prosperous and loving new year! I plan to do the same.

3 comments:

  1. Hugs to you my friend! I was just thinking, seriously just last night, that I need to get my butt back into therapy too. It takes a smart and brave woman to admit that she can't handle it all on her own, and I'm proud of you for having the guts and the brains to come to this decision.

    Actually, everything you wrote here is smart and brave. We continue to grow and learn in spite of ourselves :o)

    I hope you will keep us posted.

    Love and peace to you this new year, lady. You're pretty awesome.

    Jenny

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Jenny! I'm trying to grow (up)...LOL! I guess it's time; just turned 42.
      I think you're pretty awesome too (wish we could meet in real life)! You and your family have a great new year.

      Delete
  2. I had to do some readjusting last year because I found myself keeping company with people who supported me when I wasn't making great choices. It's been tough, but my children and I are much better for it now.

    Less time on the internet... never happen here! :-)

    ReplyDelete