Dear Ex-husband
**This post was written a few weeks ago as a rant. I never intended to post it but I think now it needs to see the light of day.**
Dear Ex husband,
Please do not ask me again to "encourage" the boy to call, spend time, whatever with you. Don't I have enough to do, what with raising him pretty much solo for 10 years. You are the adult, why does he have to pursue, call, check on you to see how you're doing? You are supposed to be the parent, you should be doing the pursuing. I think you know me well enough to know that I don't chase anyone and I do not plan to teach my child to run up behind folk, including you.
Why is it that I never have to "encourage" the boy to check on my mom or my sister? You know why, because they have spent the last 10 years cultivating and pursuing a relationship with him so he actually wants to talk to or spend time with them now. It's almost funny that you, at your age, still haven't figured out that life doesn't revolve around you and that you do need to "pursue" your kids if you want a relationship with them.
You knew that your son was out of school ALL week last week (Spring Break a few weeks ago) and you did not bother to call him once! Yet, you have the nerve to say something to me the first day back to school about HIM not calling YOU?! Bitch please! You are the same person that didn't bother to call your child on Christmas day and then show up a few days later to fuss at him (and have him in tears) for not calling you. To top it off, you give him an unwrapped Christmas gift (shirts) in a fake gift bag! Were you ever a kid?! Do you even remember what it was like and how exciting Christmas was at that age?! Are you THAT selfish?....oh, that's right, you are.
I swear it's times like this that I really wish I had chosen a different sperm donor! I also wish I been more in my right mind when the boy was born so I could have given him my family name instead of yours. At least with my name, he could've had a name to be proud of. Your entire family is trifling, including your mother that has never even sent a birthday card in 10 years, and I hate that my son has to carry that name when it really means nothing.
Fast forward to today. You know that I work Sundays and you never keep him because he'd rather stay with my sis or mom. They are out of town so I ask you to keep him, which is fine. I call last night, several times, to confirm and no answer. So when I get you this morning this is the convo:
me: did you see where I called and did you get my messages?
ex: no
me: you need to get a new cell phone then because I've never heard of a cell phone that doesn't show messages and missed calls
Lying ass! It's stuff like this that irks the hell out of me. And you wonder why I don't "encourage" the boy to call you? Please!
Dear Ex husband,
Please do not ask me again to "encourage" the boy to call, spend time, whatever with you. Don't I have enough to do, what with raising him pretty much solo for 10 years. You are the adult, why does he have to pursue, call, check on you to see how you're doing? You are supposed to be the parent, you should be doing the pursuing. I think you know me well enough to know that I don't chase anyone and I do not plan to teach my child to run up behind folk, including you.
Why is it that I never have to "encourage" the boy to check on my mom or my sister? You know why, because they have spent the last 10 years cultivating and pursuing a relationship with him so he actually wants to talk to or spend time with them now. It's almost funny that you, at your age, still haven't figured out that life doesn't revolve around you and that you do need to "pursue" your kids if you want a relationship with them.
You knew that your son was out of school ALL week last week (Spring Break a few weeks ago) and you did not bother to call him once! Yet, you have the nerve to say something to me the first day back to school about HIM not calling YOU?! Bitch please! You are the same person that didn't bother to call your child on Christmas day and then show up a few days later to fuss at him (and have him in tears) for not calling you. To top it off, you give him an unwrapped Christmas gift (shirts) in a fake gift bag! Were you ever a kid?! Do you even remember what it was like and how exciting Christmas was at that age?! Are you THAT selfish?....oh, that's right, you are.
I swear it's times like this that I really wish I had chosen a different sperm donor! I also wish I been more in my right mind when the boy was born so I could have given him my family name instead of yours. At least with my name, he could've had a name to be proud of. Your entire family is trifling, including your mother that has never even sent a birthday card in 10 years, and I hate that my son has to carry that name when it really means nothing.
Fast forward to today. You know that I work Sundays and you never keep him because he'd rather stay with my sis or mom. They are out of town so I ask you to keep him, which is fine. I call last night, several times, to confirm and no answer. So when I get you this morning this is the convo:
me: did you see where I called and did you get my messages?
ex: no
me: you need to get a new cell phone then because I've never heard of a cell phone that doesn't show messages and missed calls
Lying ass! It's stuff like this that irks the hell out of me. And you wonder why I don't "encourage" the boy to call you? Please!
Amen, my friend. This brought tears to my eyes. Tears for your boy, who has to try to understand all of this, tears for you, and tears for a-hole dads who have no idea what they're missing out on.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs.
Thanks hon. He's not a horrible person but he has NO clue when it comes to parenting; none. At this point, I have no desire to teach him.
DeleteHUGS. I understand this all too well.
ReplyDelete